Reliance and Responsibility

Oh my, today was a God day. Exhausted, I'm finally slowing down, reflecting on the incredible messages I've received today. This Sunday morning, I went to Woodland Baptist church in Chatty. It was bittersweet because I knew this could possibly be the last time I would be able to go this semester. I also knew my absence had been an extended one: It's been nearly a month since I've been. I guess you could say I was nervous. Regardless of my emotions, I was prepared to take the entire breadth of this day (and believe me, I knew it was going to be a long one) and treasure it.

God is so good. The church service began with powerful worship and striking testimonies. One woman shared with the congregation her troubles conceiving children. One description she offered still stands in my mind: She described the act of waiting. And that's just what it is, an active stretch of time, not a passive one, because even though it feels as if we are stagnant, God is working in the waiting.

Also, in the sermon, the speaker used Psalm 16:11! I almost burst into the hallelujah chorus! I was honored that God would use such little things to speak to my heart (In case you forgot, I've been storing up in my heart Psalm 16 everyday for the past 2 weeks).

In Sunday school, we talked about the characteristics of a proverb's personality. We started off negatively, pointing out the "sluggard" character emphasized in Proverbs. Strangely, the special moment I take from that time of study has nothing to do with being or not being sluggish. My moment comes from Proverbs 24:32-34 (which is the passage vigilant parents use to whip their children out of slumber)...

"I applied my heart to what I observed and learned a lesson from what I saw:
A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest—
and poverty will come on you like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man."

I fell in love with the idea captured in verse 32. What does it mean to apply my heart?

After a wonderful 5 hours spent at Panera Bread with homework and friends, it was time to head back to Woodland Park Baptist to attend the evening service called "Crave." They just started a new series called "Active" (I think) and are examining the question "When does God become real in our lives." There were so many points in that sermon I was amazed (In fact, the title of this post is one of those precious points)! One thing I noticed was how God has begun using scripture in my life. The Crave speaker started in John 7:37 where Jesus invites all those who are thirsty to come to Him and drink. From their, he led us to Jeremiah 2: 11-13, which talks about how God's people dug their own cisterns that weren't even capable of holding any water. Now these are the only two passages the speaker mentioned, but my heart led me to more. Immediately upon hearing the words "broken cisterns that cannot hold any water" (Jeremiah 2:13) I remembered the passage concerning "jars of clay" in 2 Corinthians 4: 6-12. This passage speaks about how we hold this treasure—this light of the knowledge and glory of Christ and the face of God—as delicate vessels. I have been recalling this passage repeatedly throughout this semester in my devotion book, classes, reading, and sermons. It just reminds me how intricately scripture is weaved together as a connected story: As a light to guide me on my path of study, and of life. Are you thinking of the same verse I'm thinking of? Yep, "Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path" (Psalm 119:105).

Due to the fact that this post is becoming long-winded, which I despise (maybe only in others!) I will wrap it up with a few of my own thoughts for closure. Well, first of all, I have realized a few things today, not as BOOM moments but as steady revelations.

1. I am tired of being dry, and I am placing myself "outside" so that God's life-giving rain can finally revive me.

2. I am protected, and blessed in the knowledge that my God is not holding OUT on me, He is holding ON to me.

3. My walk with God is not traditional, nor is anyone's.

4. It is not a disappointment that I am gifted (and not gifted) the way I am; God's design for me is intentional.

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