Winter Win
Good morning, everyone! Well, not everyone seeing as not everyone is a morning person (including me, remind me why I'm up again?). I'm writing you from the recliner in my parent's living room—my first cup of coffee already consumed and charging my system for the day (or at least for the hour). Why am I up so early? Well, apparently there is a handiman coming to our house sometime between now and 9am... I didn't want to be awakened by the frantic barking of my beloved but crazy poodle/guard-animal, so I figured I'd just get up. Add to this my obscene sense of alertness this morning. I couldn't go back to sleep no matter how I coached myself. I looked over at the clock thinking it had to be nearly 7:30am... but it was 6:15am! Hmmmm, close enough. In a flash, the bed was made and the coffee pot started. Yep, I was up.
Anyway, I wanted to talk briefly about the time I've enjoyed in Houston thus far. It's nothing special in that it's not elaborate or fantastical or gaudy... but it's pretty much exactly what I expected. You may not catch it when you read it, but that's the biggest blessing I've received in a long time! Read it again: it's exactly what I expected. Have you ever had your expectations altered? Disappointed? Redirected? Rejected? Dashed? Exceeded? There's something about expecting something to be a certain way... it's a powerful directer of attitudes and behaviors. If you expect something to be scary, you avoid it. If you expect something to be fun, you approach it. If you expect something to run late, you plan accordingly. We use our judgements (aka our expectations) to guide how we think and act about the things that happen to us, the things that have happened to us, and the things we expect to happen to us in the future. Like I said, expectations are a powerful thing. It's obvious to see why disappointed and dashed expectations would have a negative connotation, and in some ways exceeded expectations can fall into that category as well. I don't mean "exceed" in that the expectations we have are too low, and then we get "better" results. I'm talking about when we expect something to be challenging... and then it's the hardest fight we've ever had. I'm talking about when we expect to find one item on sale, and then the entire store is an overwhelming jackpot that we can't possibly take full advantage of considering our current budgets.
Going back to the original point of "met" expectations as being an incredible blessing in my mind... there's something about the simplicity of the word "met" that instills a sense of peace and "settledness" in my brain as I think about my expectations and my time in Houston. I expected (dare I say hoped) that my experience in Houston would be a reprieve for me. I expected to see good friends and hang out and talk and go to small group and shop and watch TV and see movies... ya know, the normal, everyday stuff. That's the kind of thing I feel I haven't done a good job engaging with recently. There's been a lot of distraction, busyness, isolation, and anxiety that impedes my ability to find and participate in the positive side of monotony (familiar and casual).
I'm still trying to figure out what it means for me to invest in the people around me during this season of my life, because there's not a time in which loving people should be put on the shelf of my life. Reaching out, initiating, sacrificing, meaningful conversations; those are my being. That's the oil I poor into this machine called life in order to keep it running smoothly. I don't want to give that up for all the papers, grades, and obligations in the world. Yet, I've compromised recently and missed out on serving others (particularly last semester). It's only in the last week or so that I've fully comprehended that and felt the drive to reintegrate service into my daily vision, but that's a story for a different time.
Anyway, being here in Houston has been exactly what I expected and I'm grateful to God for allowing me to cease striving and rest in and lean on the friends I've made in this city. It's a reminder that God can and does provide even when He leads me through the desert. I remember when I first moved to Houston, I hated it. I hated the city, I felt like the people were hard to get to know, I felt like everything was busy and congested and commercial... I wanted nothing to do with it. My plan was to work long enough to get out of debt and then leave. It took 8 months, but God finally led me to a church I loved and gave me a heart and mind to love the city (so much so that I started calling it "my" city and began taking ownership of stewarding it and praying for it).
Who's to say God couldn't do a similar miracle in my heart for Greensboro? It's hard for me to convince myself that God intends me to stay in Greensboro for very long. In fact, I perceive it to be a "blip" on God's plan for my life that we won't come to agreement on. He'll continue to say "this is part of my good plan for you," and I'll continue to say, "I think You made a mistake, but I'll look past it." Maybe He's in the process of redeeming GSO, or maybe He just wants me to persevere and learn what it looks like to find joy in sorrow, or maybe He just wants me to be stretched and challenged... it's hard to know. It's hard to know what God's intentions are, but I guess I can know that in everything His intentions are for me to be part of the body of Christ, serving others with the gifts He's imparting on me. At least, that's kind of how I interpret Romans 12:
Anyway, I wanted to talk briefly about the time I've enjoyed in Houston thus far. It's nothing special in that it's not elaborate or fantastical or gaudy... but it's pretty much exactly what I expected. You may not catch it when you read it, but that's the biggest blessing I've received in a long time! Read it again: it's exactly what I expected. Have you ever had your expectations altered? Disappointed? Redirected? Rejected? Dashed? Exceeded? There's something about expecting something to be a certain way... it's a powerful directer of attitudes and behaviors. If you expect something to be scary, you avoid it. If you expect something to be fun, you approach it. If you expect something to run late, you plan accordingly. We use our judgements (aka our expectations) to guide how we think and act about the things that happen to us, the things that have happened to us, and the things we expect to happen to us in the future. Like I said, expectations are a powerful thing. It's obvious to see why disappointed and dashed expectations would have a negative connotation, and in some ways exceeded expectations can fall into that category as well. I don't mean "exceed" in that the expectations we have are too low, and then we get "better" results. I'm talking about when we expect something to be challenging... and then it's the hardest fight we've ever had. I'm talking about when we expect to find one item on sale, and then the entire store is an overwhelming jackpot that we can't possibly take full advantage of considering our current budgets.
Going back to the original point of "met" expectations as being an incredible blessing in my mind... there's something about the simplicity of the word "met" that instills a sense of peace and "settledness" in my brain as I think about my expectations and my time in Houston. I expected (dare I say hoped) that my experience in Houston would be a reprieve for me. I expected to see good friends and hang out and talk and go to small group and shop and watch TV and see movies... ya know, the normal, everyday stuff. That's the kind of thing I feel I haven't done a good job engaging with recently. There's been a lot of distraction, busyness, isolation, and anxiety that impedes my ability to find and participate in the positive side of monotony (familiar and casual).
I'm still trying to figure out what it means for me to invest in the people around me during this season of my life, because there's not a time in which loving people should be put on the shelf of my life. Reaching out, initiating, sacrificing, meaningful conversations; those are my being. That's the oil I poor into this machine called life in order to keep it running smoothly. I don't want to give that up for all the papers, grades, and obligations in the world. Yet, I've compromised recently and missed out on serving others (particularly last semester). It's only in the last week or so that I've fully comprehended that and felt the drive to reintegrate service into my daily vision, but that's a story for a different time.
Anyway, being here in Houston has been exactly what I expected and I'm grateful to God for allowing me to cease striving and rest in and lean on the friends I've made in this city. It's a reminder that God can and does provide even when He leads me through the desert. I remember when I first moved to Houston, I hated it. I hated the city, I felt like the people were hard to get to know, I felt like everything was busy and congested and commercial... I wanted nothing to do with it. My plan was to work long enough to get out of debt and then leave. It took 8 months, but God finally led me to a church I loved and gave me a heart and mind to love the city (so much so that I started calling it "my" city and began taking ownership of stewarding it and praying for it).
Who's to say God couldn't do a similar miracle in my heart for Greensboro? It's hard for me to convince myself that God intends me to stay in Greensboro for very long. In fact, I perceive it to be a "blip" on God's plan for my life that we won't come to agreement on. He'll continue to say "this is part of my good plan for you," and I'll continue to say, "I think You made a mistake, but I'll look past it." Maybe He's in the process of redeeming GSO, or maybe He just wants me to persevere and learn what it looks like to find joy in sorrow, or maybe He just wants me to be stretched and challenged... it's hard to know. It's hard to know what God's intentions are, but I guess I can know that in everything His intentions are for me to be part of the body of Christ, serving others with the gifts He's imparting on me. At least, that's kind of how I interpret Romans 12:
A Living Sacrifice
Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.Humble Service in the Body of Christ
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.
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